Book Review: Turtles All The Way Down, John Green

Book Review: Turtles All The Way Down, John Green

Text message:

Him: And the thing is, when you lose someone, you realize you’ll eventually lose everyone.

John Green is pure genius. The thing about every story he does is how easily you find yourself being able to relate completely. Everyone does love stories but what makes each book of John Green’s so unique is the fact that besides being a master storyteller, his love stories are unconventional.

The last book he did was The Fault in Our Stars, way back in 2012. Which we all loved. And the movie was great.

Turtles All the Way Down came out in October 2017 and while I’m a lot late to the party, I’m glad I read this book. John Green does some of the most brilliant one liners. Some of the most intense too. In the whole world.

Every protagonist of his, ever, always seem like real people with real issues.

The protagonist in Turtles, Aza Holmes, is no different. She’s rather real and despite the fact that she’s battling some form of obsessive compulsive disorder, she’s also relatable. Just quickly, without giving away too much – Turtles is the story of a sixteen year old who lives with her high school math teacher Mum, drives her late Dad’s car which she’s lovingly christened Harold and sees a therapist called Dr. Karen Singh regularly. Her two friends Daisy and Mychal – a vibrant girl who does Star Wars fanfic, and an artist who looks like a “giant hot baby, if Beyoncé and Drake had a baby” respectively – are beautifully executed characters too. The contrast between Daisy and Aza is so stark and it’s almost like one acts like the Ying to the other’s Yang. Two halves of a whole and that’s some amazing female friendship come alive in fiction.

The plot takes off from the time a local billionaire construction mogul named Russell Pickett goes missing. Daisy who’s drawn to the whole idea of getting rich quick from the $100,000 reward for information leading to the man’s arrest, insists that Aza join in on her investigation. This leads to a rekindling between Aza and Pickett’s older son Davis who she met at “Sad Camp” when they each lost a parent. And just so, a very unconventional romance that I talked about earlier, blossoms. Aza battles with her anxiety and her phobia of the human microbiome, and this makes it difficult for them both to carry on. There’s this line from the book –

Illness is a story told in the past tense.

And I don’t know why, but it spoke to me.

Aza has some of the best lines – she talks of being at peace, however momentary it may be, with Davis and she talks of a “non-sensorial place almost like we were inside the others consciousness a closeness that real life with its real bodies could never match,” after a FaceTime call with Davis.

Davis has some of the cutest moments and it’s super nice when he texts Aza I like us for real. Kind of makes me wish I had someone like that; but whatever.

I kind of feel like I might give away the whole story if I keep at this. But one last thing: where did the turtles bit come from? So Daisy tells Aza a story of a scientist and who is telling a class about the earth. And one old lady at the back corrects the scientist and says that the earth is balanced on the back of a giant turtle. The scientist asks her if she knows what the said turtle is standing on. The lady replies that it’s actually another turtle: and at this point the scientist gets super frustrated but the lady says that it’s turtles standing on one another and it’s turtles all the way down.

And there you have it, folks. I’m gonna end with another quote from the book because Mr. Green’s one liners are something to obsess over completely.

No one ever says goodbye unless they wanna see you again.

Have y’all read this book? Will you watch the movie? Let me know!

Book Review: Harry Potter and The Cursed Child

Book Review: Harry Potter and The Cursed Child

When Ms Rowling doesn’t write a Harry Potter book, and lets other people do it – well, it’s a disaster waiting to happen . Oh Potter, you rotter…

First off, writing Harry Potter in PLAY FORM? That’s just wrong. On so many levels. 

The book (shall we call it that or just, more appropriately, call it trash) starts where the seventh book left off basically. King’s Cross. Harry’s youngest boy, Albus Severus gets put in Slytherin, becomes best friends with DRACO MALFOY’S son, Scorpius – who has a crush on Rose Granger-Weasley. Does any of that surprise you? 

Oh, and Hermione is Minister for Magic. That’s my favorite bit. 

Who’s the cursed child, you ask? I’d assumed it would be Albus. Or Scorpius, even. But no. It’s this whole new character called Delphi ‘Diggory’. Remember that part in Deathly Hallows when Rowling says this about Bellatrix: 

…mere words could not demonstrate her longing for closeness.

Well apparently, Bella darling did get some that night. Some post dinner Voldy/Bella action totally happened and then… Delphi. You do realize I’m shaking my head at this point, don’t you? Harry Potter isn’t a children’s book anymore if it’s talking about adultery. Bella may have found the Dark Lord broody and hot as hell, but did she really have to cheat on poor old Rudolphus? At least this guy had a nose. I mean, come on, Bella. 

Gross. 

Also, the book has quite a few typos. 

I also don’t like the fact that Time-Turners were used to alter the whole story line. The whole lot was smashed in Order of the Phoenix and should have stayed that way. You don’t fix anything Harry Potter. You just don’t. 

In other words, I positively loathe this book. Thank Goodness the book is really pretty looking. Black and gold leather(ish), hardcover. I’m nearly done with John’s reading challenge – The Cursed Child fulfils the “book published in 2016” category.

This piece of – I’m truly, utterly, sorry – crap deserves a zero rating. 

Rant over. 

Book Review: Carry On

Book Review: Carry On

Rainbow Rowell is probably my favorite YA author. I’ve read Eleanor and Park 300 times. The only book of hers that I didn’t particularly like was Landline. I read Carry On earlier this year, and I re-read it yesterday, and well, it’s a good book. 

It talks about a powerful wizard (magician?) called Simon Snow and his relationship with Baz, his roommate. And also, it uncovers many mysteries. Set in 2015, it talks about the world of Mages, where laptops work. And cell phones. Compared to Harry Potter, this is new. No Muggle gadget would work within Hogwarts. But at Watford, where Simon goes to school, Normal (non magic people) gadgets do work. 

Rowell took a lot of inspiration from Harry Potter, obviously. But she put her own twist to it. 

This is also a love story, of Baz the vampire and Simon the chosen one. Does this remind you of the obvious love story gone sour between Dumbledore and Grindelwald? That JK Rowling never mentioned in the books, but told us later? Yes. 

Rowell’s Penelope is obviously a version of Rowling’s Hermione. The brains. The finely honed spell work. It’s brilliant and unsettling because the spells in Carry on are like regular everyday phrases like “Clean as a whistle”. What?! A tad bit unsettling. 

The romance is the nicest part. Kissing moles like they were a target? Oooooooh. 

Have you read this book? Thoughts?

Book Review: Ten Tiny Breaths

Book Review: Ten Tiny Breaths

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Trying to show off my nails here.

So this is the eleventh book I read for the Johnny Reads 2016 Reading Challenge.

And just because I’m shallow and I go by looks, I was drawn to Ten Tiny Breaths. Whose looks? Trent Emerson’s. In my head he looks like a dimpled cross between Dave Franco and Matt Bomer. Don’t judge. I got this from reading the back of the book. First 30 seconds.

And Kacey Cleary kinda reminds me of me. Except well the kickboxing part. And the uh, sex part. The only time I ever kicked something was a chair and it bloody hurt. And forget about the uh, sex.

Moving on.

Ten Tiny Breaths was originally self-published. The author, K. A. Tucker did a really good job, bringing the car crash scene come to life. That’s yet another book I’ve read this year that involves a car crash. (The only difference is I actually liked the other book, If I Stay, better.) It tells the story of Kacey who loses most of her family in a car accident, when a drunk driver crashes into their car. Ooh, and the other car has one survivor too, Cole Reynolds, who – scared out of his wits and drunk – climbs out of the passenger seat and runs away.

Once you start reading this book, however, you think to yourself, “Damn, the author really wants ME to feel the two lead characters’ sexual tension.” This Trent Emerson dude. Smouldering hot piece of blue eyed and dimpled arse. Wait. Why are ALL the characters supposed to be good looking? I want to read a book that has a man with neurofibromatosis as the lead, and that he falls in love. And is loved in return. I want a book that has a Greek God fall for not a Greek Goddess, but a plain Jane with exophthalmos. Writers gotta stop writing out too much perfection. Look at what Disney did to me and my hair expectations.

Uh oh, I deviated way too far from the topic.

Back to the book itself, some of the characters are pretty interesting. You have a extra buxom stripper called Storm who falls in love with a Police Officer. A club owner called (wait for it) Cain. It’s pretty predictable though, the book. Halfway through it you totally realize what’s happening. That Trent is Cole. That he changes his name. And “fixing” Kacey who uses kickboxing and mindless sex and shutting people out as coping mechanism from the PTSD, becomes his own way of dealing with HIS OWN POST TRAUMATIC STRESS. Lovely.

All sarcasm aside, it has a beautiful love story too. It made me cry. Don’t judge. Again. I actually really liked it too. I know I’m being weird and contradictory.

Should you read this book? Yes, if you’re looking for a light read and want to finish a series. There are four subsequent books.

Have you read this book? What did you think?

January Favorites 2016!

January Favorites 2016!

Dang. February’s here. Like, isn’t that a bit too soon?! The past month has been okay, no major catastrophes; I basically rediscovered a lot of old favorites. And since I’ve been traveling a lot, I have a lot of minis as my favorites, rather than the full sized versions. Without further ado…

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1. Lorac Pro Palette: This sucker is amazing, even though the matte shades are a bit too powdery. But nothing can beat the fact that it is so versatile, travel friendly and has BOTH matte and shimmer shadows. Win win.

2. Benefit Sugarlicious lip and cheek kit: I bought this because of the tiny High beam and Bene tint, and obviously they pack a punch – what surprised me was how beautiful that lip gloss looked on the first time I slapped it on. And I’ve been wearing it a lot. Coming from me, a total lip gloss hater, it’s huge. Love this kit. Love, love.

3. ColourPop Super Shock Cheek in Tongue Tied, and highlighter in Stole the Show: Holy Mama. These guys are THE bomb. Specially the highlighter. I can’t help wishing the pan was enormous and I could stick my face in it. It’s that good.

4. Benefit fake up concealer in light: For some reason, I ended up looking like a panda or a mutant raccoon this past month. This under eye concealer saved my life. Hahha.

5. Bite Beauty Lip Crayon in Meritage: It ain’t red, it ain’t nude, it ain’t pink and it ain’t berry. It’s the perfect in between shade. Loving this baby.

6. Nars lip gloss in Orgasm: (Yes. ANOTHER GLOSS. Yep, still me.) Just like the blush, this peachy lip gloss has gold shimmer in it. And it’s the wedding season. Need I say more? For those of y’all asking, no it doesn’t do anything for your sex life. Certainly hasn’t helped mine.

7. Nars Via Veneto Larger than Life Long Wear Eyeliner: Creamy, jet black, long lasting. You got me.

8. Stila Stay All Day Waterproof Liquid Eyeliner: This reminds me of Kat von D’s Tattoo liners. I have this in the shade dark brown for those days when I don’t want a crisp winged liner, and would rather settle for a subtle one.

9. Urban Decay makeup setting spray: Makeup tends to slide off my face when I least want it. This guy keeps it locked in.

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Some swatches for y'all.

I’ve just finished reading The Exorcist – which means I’ve read about ten books in January. All time low. My favorite would have to be Tuesdays with Morrie. That book is something.

I also binge watched Once upon a time. To the point of severe dry eye from staring at the laptop all day. That show is so good.

What have y’all been loving this past month?

10 Signs You’re With The Wrong Person

10 Signs You’re With The Wrong Person

Disclaimer: Don’t take this post seriously, it’s only meant to make you laugh.

1. They don’t like food. Very VERY suspicious. I mean, who doesn’t like food? Maybe aliens. So, if your partner is way too picky about food – doesn’t like chocolate or pizza, that kind of thing – run.

2. They have time to reply to all the hobos on social media, but can’t stay online to text you for ten minutes seconds. Self-explanatory.

3. They’re weirdly narcoleptic. They’re probably totally baked all week.

4. They don’t want to meet and they come up with the lamest excuses. Ranging from dead relatives to bad cell phone reception to being out of town or being BROKE.

5. THEY ARE BROKE ALL THE TIME. Sure, we all believe in going halvsies. But you make me pay for everything every damn time? I’m sorry, you gotta pack up and leave.

6. They have a problem with what you’re spending on. Uh, lipstick is life. I’m not asking you to get me any. It’s my money and it’s Valentine’s Day soon, and I need to spoil myself.

7. They NEVER buy you anything. Whoa. Crappy. Nobody wants you to spend a million. But, a candy bar once in a while, out of the blue, would be nice. Heard of “nice”?

8. They act mysterious, and half the time you don’t know where they at. Time to get a new partner.

9. They are rude to everyone. And they hate holidays. Uh oh. You’re next. Watch out.

10. They are never there for you. Now this bothers me. If you’re in a relationship, you’re not supposed to let your partner down all the time. Fly down to see them if you have to. Just be there. Or do the easy thing, walk away.

In other news, I’ve just finished reading Finding Audrey for John’s reading  challenge. Oh my Gosh, y’all. This book is so funny!! Typical Sophie Kinsella funny. And then some.

I mean there are a gazillion and one books out there that talk about clinical depression, and panic attacks and other teenage issues but I haven’t read anything quite so… Touching. And funny. This book just reaches out to you. (Not to mention, the NAME Audrey. My favorite movie star of all time. AND my favorote lipstick!) Go grab it. If the other books from my reading challenge made me super sad, this one lifted my spirits right back up. Yay!

Let’s Chat!

Let’s Chat!

You know how YouTubers chat with their subscribers? Do people do that on blogs? I don’t know, but let’s just talk. Since I couldn’t post yesterday and I’m struggling to look away from Captain Hook’s beautiful kohl-rimmed eyes, and finish my typing. Ugh. See how makeup distracts me? Lord help me.

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I used to watch Once Upon a Time back in college and then life got way too busy to d’aww over Hook and Snow and Charming. But I’m binge watching it again and – you know what? – rediscovering old memories is a beautiful thing. I’m so glad my aunt’s farmhouse doesn’t have a functional working WiFi thingy, and I got to reconnect with nature, and cows, and well, old favorite shows that I abruptly stopped watching.

Ooh, have y’all ever touched a cow? It’s grossly fascinating. They have these giant eyes that makes them look like they’ve got scleral lenses on. And they have weird tongues. One of my aunt’s cows, the smallest one, Caramel, she licked my hand. Some damn scratchy tongue!!! Ack-ification.

Back to my show, I love badass characters like Hook and Regina. Oh my goodness, Lana Parrilla’s acting is ON POINT. That emotionless thing she does with her eyes. She makes evil look so smoking sexy. And now I have a woman crush. The world is ending.

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She makes ball gowns and latex look weirdly porny-chic.

I’m also on to my fifth book in the Johnny Reads 2016 Reading Challenge – I’m reading If I Stay by Gayle Forman. (Book with movie tie-in cover) This book is making me terribly sad, I need to go drool over Colin O’Donoghue’s eyes now. Hello, New Man Crush.

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💖

Are there any shows you’ve rediscovered? And fallen in love with all over again? Also, what are you currently reading? Let me know!

Oooh. Check This Out!

Oooh. Check This Out!

Why is Ginnifer Goodwin so pretty?!

I’ve been binge watching Once Upon a Time like a retarded seal, clapping my hands every time someone talks about “true love” (which is about 4626255251 times in season one alone). I also realized that the concept of arranged marriages is actually very much global. And it’s not just an Indian or an Asian thing.

Here’s the catch, though. It’s a middle earth/ medieval thing. Hahaha. Indian parents are stuck with the mentality of medieval peasants! Speaking of medieval peasants, that’s what I’m gonna feel like after I’ve binge watched everything and there’s nothing left to watch.

Also, what’s up with girls acting so pricey on Instagram? Do any of y’all really care about how many followers y’all have? I’ve had people randomly ask me what I did and who I PAID to get as many followers. Dear God. I’m only just being myself on there. Unlike some people, who aren’t really what they post to be. Ugh.

Moving on, I finished my fourth book off the Johnny Reads 2016 Reading Challenge list. I read this book by Libba Brey called Going Bovine. On the flight. What a refreshing change from all the serious books I’ve been reading! How far along are you guys?

This was my Tuesday in a nutshell. Random ramblings.

Beautiful Blogger Award💅

Beautiful Blogger Award💅

So M nominated me for the Beautiful Blogger Award and I’m gonna jump right in before I talk too much, since this would take forever otherwise.

The Rules:

1. Give the person who nominated you a shout out and display the award logo on your blog.
2. State seven random facts about yourself.
3. Nominate other people.

Here comes the awkward part. Seven random facts about myself. Okay, here goes nothing:

1. Now that many of us are doing the Johnny Reads 2016 Reading Challenge, which requires you to read 20 books – I HAVE to tell you that I read pretty fast. Thank you, giant med school text books. I’ve already finished book three. Book recommend to you by a friend (Tuedays with Morrie). That book is gut-wrenching. In a good way.

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I needed caffeine to handle this.

2. I love Earl Grey. No, I’m not British. I just fell back in love with tea.

3. I mostly have a photographic memory when it comes to people I care about. I’ll remember everything. And use that to my advantage later, depending on whether I wanna win a fight or let go.

4. I claim to hate romance novels and movies ONLY because I’m honestly lonely as ever and they make me cry.

5. I have a thing for the colors white, turquoise and mint.

6. Like every other beauty junkie, I buy lipsticks that look EXACTLY the same.

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Case in point. Anyone want a review?

7. I hate my teeth. Which is why I don’t smile.

As for the nominations, I pick the following blogs:

Hened
Katyayini
Veronica, Maybe
Samantha
and Accidental Hipster Mum

And also, ALL of you. Don’t be blog snobs. (Go do the tag, if you want to. No obligations.) Everyone is beautiful.

WTF Wednesday – #25

WTF Wednesday – #25

I just realized I’ve changed so much over the past year. I mean, I would never swear on my blog unless I was doing fiction and one of my characters did it. But now? I swear all the time.

Also, I stopped saying my two favorite things – sucks bananas and what the badooshes – when did that happen?! This is so not me. Ugh.

Also, did you know that there are several fake profiles on Instagram? Guys pretending to be other people. Don’t get fooled. If it’s someone with horrible English, chances are they’re serial killers. From India. Or if you happen to get a direct message from a person claiming to be a director/modeling agency agent, be sure to check out his profile – most of them are almost always pimps.

This happened to me. Thank goodness I don’t accept DMs. *shudder*

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I had to update this. The other post had some errors.

So Tanya got me a David Baldacci book as a New Year present, and I’m digging it. As usual, every King and Maxwell book that Mr. Baldacci has done is super GRIPPING and now I have no nails left because I’ve been chewing on them.

This book ticks off the Crime Novel bullet in the Johnny Reads 2016 Reading Challenge and I can’t wait more. (I might be deriving cheap thrills from beating John at his own challenge. Shh.)

Are y’all doing this challenge?